Cycle News - Archive Issues - 1970's

• . IIIlI => ~ . I [PO'''''''' . " t ! " r ~ t""t""O') -'" ~ i ~ ..,.":..~ .- ~ II " ,,';' ,= , NOII'TM " OTt _ _ CD..II!'W CN I: ::l -, . DItI'It: I I i . W ~ » __ ~ _ .. l lOUT' (;) .. ~ : ,.... : I ji" I-=,ft"" _ _ _ _ ---., 0 i .. D a I[ SEATI NG AND T RACK MAP . . .. 01" _ 2- ~ ~ I w. - -- - - - -='-----, r-I '" ""'" .... < ~ -~ ~[~ ...:'~- I ~ - -- _ .... _- Iii - " 1.. 1 0 , .::..... .::::.:::...; _.. ._........... 0 cca swr.. . . ...... 0 _ ] , ::J ~ -~--J' a_- 11) :D~ """ o~~ ~\ 0') .... r-----l ~ What Won't Be Happening at Superbowl VI. Are you related to Abraham F. Clouktz? T hat' s right. There's a lot of things that just aren't going to happen at the Superbowl of Motocross VI, to either yourself or your friends, provided you follow these directions. 18 For instance, you won't get stuck in a traffic jam . Now, if you don't know who Billy Carter is, have never experienced the resurrecting miracles of the shower massage, and have never picked up a magazine with Farrah Fawcett-Majo rs on the cover, then obviously you've never heard of, or experienced a traffic jam . The rules are simple. You, along with everyone else, tries to all go the same place, by the same route , at the same time. Eventually, you (and one of the other contestants) will crash into each other, after which you pull over to the side of the road . Now it's the remaining contestants' turn. They get to crash into each other because they slowed down to see what damages happened to your car while you crashed into someone else. BUT if you're tuned into the hot lines, you know that to get to the Los Angeles Coliseum, you can take either the Santa Barbara or Exposition Blvd. of framps from the Harbor Freeway, or the Normandie or Vermont exist off the Santa Monica freeway, and miss all the traditional bumper banging, screaming, yelling and ceremonious exchanging of addresses, names and insurance company phone numbers . Or you could go completely by surface streets, avoiding the freeway altogether, and getting tons of material for the fall when you write your yearly "How I Spent My Summer Vacation" essay. Remember last year when, just after Easter, you put a sleeping bag and knapsack on your' mother's back, patted her on the head, and pointed her in the direction of the Coliseum so that, by the time the Superbowl rolled around you would have a choice place to park your ' 63 Ranchero ? You don' t have to do that this year, There are no conflicting events; the entire Coliseum and Sports Arena park ing lots have been reserved. Even if you don 't have a car , you don' t have to ,worry about renting a plane and trying to parachu te in again, only to get struck by crosswinds and land in the La Brea Tar Pits. There 's a bus shuttle service being set up right now through participating HarleyDavidson dealers-it's easy, just buy a SIS VIP ticket at the Harley dealer's and you can ride the Superbowl Superbus for free to and from the event. You know all those football games you go to? When you get to the ticket line it looks like lemmings runnina· to the sea. The line itself is four miles long, reswtin, in sill marriages, 48 divorces, and twelve babies beina born between the time you get in line and the time you let to the turnstyle and hand over your Will the track be exciting? Remember last year? bid you see that ambulance in the infield that said " Trauma Unit" on the side? That was for the spectators-you should see what they have in the underground tunnel for the riders! ticket. Not ai The Superbowl of Motocross VI.'There will be 30010 more ticket takers, ticket sellers and parking attendants, plus a special new gate PA system will be rigged up to direct you toward uncongested gates and tunnels. Say for instance that you secretly know that the Los Angeles Freeway system was designed by an epeleptic draftsman working for Cal-Tran s, and decide to leave early for the race and miss the rush. No problem . You don ' t have to sit around watching the grass grow, rust form on your car bumper, or your girlfriend age before your very eyes. Over at the Sports Arena (a mere tennis lob away) you can take in the Harley Davidson On-Track Motorc ycle Show, with the entire line of 1977 bikes, plus 500 of the most. exotic mounts in Southern California. The park ing lot opens at 9 AM , the show goes from 10 AM to 8 PM and then again from II PM and on. The best part is it's. not going to cost you an arm and a leg (which you might otherwise have ,torn off another waiting specta tor just to see his reaction because you're so bored of sitting around). The Harley- Davidson show at the Coca-Cola Bottlers' Superbowl of Motocross is absolutely free. Once you get inside the Coliseum and settled in your seat, ready for the races, you' ll find tha t you're not going to be greeted with a four foot wide track that's seemingly six miles away, resulting in permanent eye strain damage. The Mike Goodwin-des igned Coliseum track. (rated as one of the best by the riders) is now 25070 wider, has sawdust rote-tilled into the turns for berm building and busting and incorporates a new super rough, but fast design for Superbowl VI. (Side by side racing is in-the " freight tra in" effect is out ). Goodwin observed many of the stadium events of past years and incorporated all the best feat ures from each track into the evolutionary new designat the Coliseum you' ll see the infamous Camelbac k Jump from Daytona, Anaheim's big berms, a treacherous double jump, Atlanta' s multi line turns and still get the super Ski Jump over the seats to the floor of the course. The riders start out down a 7o-mile-an-hour straightaway that suddenly climbs up past the bleachers into the Peristyle, and catapults the riders in free flight for ISO feet back down to the stadium floor. It's kind of like hang gliding with a rock instead of a kite. Then riders are routed over Goodwin 's Gorge, into a sharp left hand turn , then a wierdo 6 foot off-camber turn, over Insanit y Ridge which launches them off a 7 foot jump sixty feet down track, and just to make it more exciting, a generous sprinkling of whoop-dee-does , wheel breakers, sharp jumps, nasty ruts are added , along with the 12 foot Matterhorn that would whiten the .knuckles of an albino Aust rian Mountain goat . AOV ERnSEM EST Speaking of riders, another thing you're not going to see at the Coca-Co la Bottlers' Superbowl of Motocros s VI is Harland Plots (or his brother, Ferd) competing out there with the big guys. The Superbowl of a 100070 professional show, with riders including five-time World Champ Roger DeCosterSuzuki, current national stadium points leader Bob Hannah, 1976 Stad ium Champ Tony DiStefanoSuzuki , Grand Prix winner Jim Pomeroy-Honda, double Superbowl winner Marty Tripes-Harley-Davidson, and Kent Howerton-Husky-plus the rest of the fast guys will be there, ' competing in the evening's events. Every brand battling with every championever. And they'll really be going for it as the Superbowl is the big stop , the Grand-daddy of the quarter million dollar stadium motocross circuit. (Last year, superstar competitor " Jammin' Jimmy" collected over S21,OOO for second place!!!!) Something else that isn't going. to happen is people falling asleep in the stand s out of sheer boredom. You're going to see some serious, almost non-stop racing. You see, these racers aren't the type that chase inflated pigskins aro und a grass field, then appear on television, tou ting the praises of panty hose, furniture polish or tooth deodorant (tooth deodorant?. JUST WAIT-it's bound to hit the market soon). Instead , motocross riders work hard for a living, and don't kick back. To win the Superbowl you have to hump, ride fast, and be able to pilot a 220 pound snarling motocross machine faster than the other guys. You're going to see more racing this year than ever before, and each time the gate drops, it counts. There ' s four 10 lap qualifying motos, two 10 lap semi-finals, one IS lap consolation race, and then the biggie, a single 20 lap, sudden death , winner take all, final event, where anything goes and there's no referee calling fouls because of someone 's elbow permanently planted in someone else's forehead, or time outs because one of the participants sprained an eyebrow hair and wants his personal doctor to take a " lookey-see" , So' we've solved your driving, park ing and gettingin problem s. Of course the race itself is the most exciting, highest attended motorized event in the western port ion of the United States , and you owe it to yourself to attend . Wear your best looking t-shirt-CBS will be there filming again , and all the newspapers and magazines will be taking pictures. If all of this doesn ' t thrill you, you could always stay home and watch Let's Make a Deal with Monty Hall. But does a guy who's got a thing for women dressed up as turnips really have it over the likes of five time World Champion Roger DeCoster , current series leader and wonder kid Bob "Hurricane" Hannah or our Superbowl Grand Marshall, Baretta' s Robert Blake. " And you can take that to the bank ." If you don 't go to the Superbowl of Motocross VI, chances are you' re in the same class as Abraham F. Clou ktz, who couldn 't win a beauty contes t at an ostrich farm, sent away for the book "How to Pick Up Girls" and (while waiting for it to arri ve in the mail) figured he'd get a head start by practicing lifting up his sisters after dinner; bought · a Pet Rock and too k it back because he though t it died , thinks that Planned Parenthood is a place where you adopt parents, and failed Beginning Hair Combing in his seventh year of high schoo l. Don 't miss the Superbowl of Motocross VI, and end up holding hands with Abe while watching Monty Hall. Check out the oppos ite page for all the info on tickets and times. We guarantee that you'll enjoy the show, wonder why you missed it before, and most of all, sleep well at night, knowing that the stadium racing god , Bermious Wheelious, is smiling kindly upon you.

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