Cycle News - Archive Issues - 1990's

CHICANERY B enny RayAbrams yH v ry e wa s tau ght at a' y~ung ag; tha t if yo u h ave nothing ni ce to say, say it about sidecars. Sidecars are the answer to th e qu estio n, What do yo u get w hen yo u m ix guys wi th more mon ey than sense, and too much free time? N orrnallv, hookers, but in this case, oil-pu king O'ld pi les of fatigu ed metal, cracking plas tic and rotting rubber. Put anot her way, they are the answer to th e qu es tion tha t w as never asked: What do yo u ge t wh en you im plant an obso lete mot or on a shipping pallet with w heels? Who cares? It'd be like tryi ng to gra ft a salad shoo ter on a breast pu mp. Or putting a Harley motor in a spo rtbike fram e. This is a recreation al activity done by two guys in lea th er o n their knees . I believe that makes it illega l in Utah. To be accurate, wom en d o it, too. (You can quit droolin g anytime.) The pa ssenger is called th e monkey, because w hen thi s spo rt was origina lly conceived , monk eys were the only things dumb enough to sit next to the guy at the controls and hang their bare asses inches a bove th e track . Then th e monkeys protested and the ASPCA got involved , w hich was how it was discovered th a t monkeys were so smart -To this day, the handrail the p assenger ho lds on to is called the ban an a, which is, you know, not su rprising considering you've got two guys in leath er on their knees. Or women. My consideration of this issue d id no t s ta r t wh en they bega n fo uling race tracks this yea r. I have been covering Grands Pri x for Cycle News since 1981 and h a ve see n th e b est, Bil and & Walti sperg, the British guy an d the o the r Briti sh g uy, and so me Sw iss bro th ers . (No t black guys, but tw o dud es w ho ac tu a lly s lid o ut of th e same wornb.) They we re the best - cutting edge - and still th ey've been relegated to seco nd-tier sta tus on the wo rld level. If th er e's no hope for the best , w ha t hope is there for th e liqui d-bar fing ar tifacts that fester on the AM A sched ule like a year-old bedso re? About as much hop e as a Hyp erCycle Su zuki ge tti ng through postrace tech withou t a n AMA officia l saying, "Does he th ink we're retarded?" Not that th ese sidecars don 't have a stri ngent set of technical rules; they do: No electronic devices that cou ld interfere wi th pacema ke rs , p rescri p tion windscreens, gel-filled seats, and a noise limit of a d illion d ecibels. I By th e wa y , if yo u' re thi n king of sc rawling a ngry le tters to the editor d en ou nci ng th is co lumn, jus t put the crayons ba ck in th e bo x right now and go back to th e shuf fleboard cou rt. In a very unscien tific poll, I asked a number of people if th ey cou ld nam e a single sidecar pa rtici pant. ot a single rider could na me eve n one, thou gh Yoshimura Suzu ki's Mat Ml a d in a nswe red, "Bob?" Sma rt ass. No one - I repeat for dram atic effect and to fiII space, no one - comes to an AMA Na tiona l to see sidecars - I repeat, sidecars. The y come to see the bes t twow heeled rac er s in Ameri ca doin g what they do best - something they're de prived o f wh en th ese underpo w er ed d ollies make the track oilier than asa una full of lawyers. It has happ en ed th e las t three times they ran . It happened at Lagu na Seca, wh er e a rig gre ased up almost th e entire track. After a few of the rid ers in th e 600cc Su pers port class no ticed the oil, there was about a 45-minute cleanup. Th at left a line of Oil dri almost everywhere and traction had to be compromised. Even if it was n' t, th e per cep tion exis ted that it was . And because it wasn't visib le to the nak ed eye, it was the riders who noticed the oil, not the comer wo rkers who were not to blame, since they cou ldn't see the insidious deposit. It happened last week a t Lou don, a nd it ha ppen ed th e week befo re a t Road America. At Elkhart Lake, it ha ppe ned so often tha t the corner worker in turn five nearly to re a rota tor cuff throwing up more red flags t ha n a Hype rCycIe Suzuki going throug h tech inspection. Unnecessary d elays were ca used a number of times, and fo r what? So a hand ful of nostal g ists can justify the ex pense o f o w ni ng m ot o riz ed turtle / skateboards, so they can have an a nsw er fo r th eir wives w he n th ey' re as ke d, '-'Why d on 't yo u get rid of that pile of crap so we can have room in the ga rage for somethin g u seful , like las t yea r's mulch pile?" Th e situ ation at Loudon coul d have been tr agic on a week en d repl ete with traged y. Onl y dumb luck saved the day. A light rain fell as the 250s we re gridded for thei r I p.m. race . When they fina lly go t going, Erion Racing 's Randy Renfrow noticed some thing was wrong . He alerted AMA officials who relaved their concerns to the corner work~rs. What they fo u nd was oil p re tty much everywhere. The cu lp ri t was a sidecar which had leaked oil onto one of its tires and then circulated the track, coa ting the surface with lubricant like a paint roller, only less useful. On a track w hich had already exacted a terrible human toll, on a weekend which will certainly bri ng much-needed reform, the possibility of starting a race on an even more unsafe track is frig htening . O nce the oil was discovered, th er e was another 40-minute delay while th e track was cleared, and even then, ride rs in the Superbike class, ru n after the 25Os, felt the track was still oilier the publisher of a roa d racing mon th ly. Co u ld this h appen w i th a m ot o rcycle? Of course it could, bu t belly pa ns o n su perbikes m ak e it less like ly. The s u pport classes d on 't have belly pa ns a nd th ere a re th os e t hat thi n k thev should . In the goo d old days, before Pro Blund er, I can recall seeing an 883 engine exp lode at Phoenix, leaving not only oil but met al and cha mpionship hopes o n the track as well. Some of the more mod ern sidecars have made an effo rt to fit oil-eontainme nt devices, and th e movemen t is grow ing. But they d on't all have them, and the antique class wo uld serve motorcycling better by oiling d us ty dirt tracks. It's also easier to spot fluids leaving a mot orcycle tha n it is a low-eapacity hovercraft. And it's less likely to happen to a mo torcycle mad e in the past yea r or two tha n to one mad e d ecad es before HyperCycle Suzuki's first DQ. Fortunately the AMA is aware of the havoc the cha irs ha ve caused on a series which gets bett er every yea r. AMA road ra ce m an a g er Ron Barrick ' sa id a t Lou d on , "Obv iously, the sidecars are a big issue for next yea r." Barrick understands that the promoters should be able to add en tertainment, but wo nders abou t sidecars. "We' ve go t to sit down and, maybe at th e AMA Pro Racing board level, decide w he the r we' re even go ing to negotiate regarding that," he said, add ing, "I con side r this a serio us concern for our tw ow heel riders." If you' re a sidecar racer, and you can read between the lines, you might plan your su mmer vacation now. If promoters do n't th ink th at having the bes t ri ders on the fas test bi kes is enough, they could always get a stunt rider like Gary Rothwell , w hose bargainba sement Suzu ki sp rayed oil o n to th e racing line on the front straigh t at Road Atla n ta, n early ca usi ng the live TV broad cast to be d elayed , Then the bozos running the wa ter tru ck could n' t figure ou t where the "on" swi tch was, turnin g the cleanup into a Three Stooges routi ne - and not a bad one, at tha l. I sto pped to look at one of these relics at Elkhart La ke. Let me rephrase that: My path was needl essly im peded by one of th e se reli cs a t El kha rt La ke. It ap peared to ha ve a Yama ha 650cc tw in eng ine, an eng ine w hich has been out of production si nce di sco died - th e first tim e. The fra me had more pipes than a head sho p and the rear tire looked like it was lifted from a riding mower - proba.bly in th e middle of the night, which is too bad, becau se a riding mower with three wh eels is still more useful than one of th ese mon ey pits. Whi ch made me th ink: Wh y not ha ve a r iding-m ower ex hibition? Besid e s building motorcycles, Honda also makes rid ing mowers. It's a natural fit. No ne of the othe r riders have contracts with the m ower compa nies, with th e p os sibl e excep tio n of Muzzy Kawasaki's Doug Chand ler, so yo u could ge t them to rid e the things, all helmeted and leathered up for action. Semis of wo rks m achinery from Toro, John Deere, Cub Cad et, and Hon da could sit proud ly n ext to the H onda , Va nce & Hin es Du cat i, and Yamaha rigs . The mowers cou ld be fitted. with those sweeper things on the back so they could clean the track rather than oil it, during their "race." What's th e worst th ing that cou ld happen if th ey ran off the track? Th ey'd mow the lawn. And, of co u rse, i t goes with out s aying th a t they' d be faster than sidecars. There would, of course, have to be a rigorou s se t of technical rules. Is the 36inch blade legal or can you run the 32 to cut wind resistance? What about pitch? What is pitch? Must reverse gear work ? What ab out fun ctionin g g rass catche rs? Th e p o ss ibil it y o f ch ica ne ry is o m ni p resent . No w I'm h e arin g that H yperCycl e wants to en ter th e class. Quick, ge t me so me calipers an d a jug of es p resso - it' s gonna be a lon g n ig h t, Chester. n ~ LO K O INGBACK... 30 Y SAGO EAR ... JULY 25,1968 20 Y EARSAGO... JULY 12,1978 10 Y SAGO... EAR JU Y6 1988 L , ini road racing was the top story in thi s issu e as the AMA G rand National Championship Series' heavy-hitters dropped into Heidelberg Raceway in Western Pen nsylvania to battle on a 3500-foot course with absolutely no straightaways. Walt Fulton (H-D) wa s the Exper t winner... The racing was fas t a nd ferocious at the Richmond Ramblers motocross course in Richmo nd, Ca lifornia . Harry Dring (BSA) wo n the Open Ex pert / A ma te ur class, w hile Bruce Teixei ra (Bul) topped th e 250cc Exp ert class... In th e face of suc h stiff weekly com p etition, Mel Lacher (HD) was o n an u nbelievable roll at the Ascot Speedway half mil e. Lach er won his fift h stra igh t ma in event... Ed die M u lder (Eso) w as becomin g quite th e speedway rid er; Mulder won the A main at Whitem an Stadium in Pacoima , California... Triumph bou ght a twopa ge col or sp re ad to ad vertise Gary Nixon's w in a t th e Columbus, Ohio, Nati onal held o n June 30. im "The Ani mal" Fishbac k wa s our cove r bo y, as he made his return to Southern California sp eed way racing after a seven -month layoff... Steve Eklund (H-D) put a last-lap pass on Garth Bro w (H-D) to notch his thi rd straight f.,MA Grand Na tional victory, th is one coming at the San [ose Half Mile . Steve Morehead (H-D) was thi rd ... Bob Hanna h's eight-race 250cc MX National win s treak came to a halt a t Red Bud Track 'N' Trail, w he re he suffered a chai n derailment in m ot o o ne . Kent Howerton (Suz) w ent on to pick up the slack and sco re the overall wi n. Rick Burgett (Yam) took the overa ll wi n in th e 500cc Na tional class... Randy Mamola (Yam) won th e A FM Go lden Gate road race at Sears Point Raceway in Sono ma, California ... We too k a look at the 125cc equ ipm en t being used in the AMA Nationa l MX Series. im Coombs (Ho n) wheelied his way onto the cover as the winner of " A m e rica ' s toughest off-road race", the Blackwater 190, which was promoted by hi s fa ther, Dave Coombs... Belgi um's Eric G ebo ers (Hon) bea t the Americans in their own back ya rd by taki ng the overall win at the U.S. GP SOOcc MX at Hol list er Hills, Ca lifornia. It marked the first time in five yea rs th at a Euro had wo n the event... Steve Morehead (H-D) sco red his third AMA Gra nd Na tiona l victory of the yea r with a win a t round six of the se ries, the Lima Half Mile. Morehead beat H-D factory rid ers Chris Carr an d Scott Parker... Doug Polen (Suz) captured his seco nd AMA Na tio na l road race wi n in a ro w a t Road Ame rica in Elkhart Lake, Wisconsin, an d also grabbed a w in in th e 600cc Supersport class ... David Rop er (Mat) w on the 500cc Premier race during th e AHRMA road 1-:\ race action in Laconia, New Hampshi re, M 88 J T

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